Tuesday, April 21, 2015

*awkward hai*

Hi. Its been a year and a half maybe. Its 2015. Like omg. I can't believe I didn't update here wait post something here. Idk whr to start. A lot had happened in this well almost 2 years. I've graduated. Yeay! Tq God for that. Haha. And my Malay language kinda suck, again. Lol. Haven't use it in a very long time. So excuse my language since I don't even use English language anymore. (Both are not my main language)

What else. Ahh. In case ure wondering. No. I didn't continue my study. I didn't continue anything. I just put my life on hold this couple of years. I'm at home. Eating, sleeping, waking up the next day and gaining weight. Lol. People around me keep nagging and forcing me to do something with my life. Get a job. Continue study. Get married. Do something!!! I just look at em with my pairs of big eyes while eating chips and say nothing.

People are kinda get frustrated and maybe disappointed seeing how i live my life. I didn't even want to get out from the house. I just idk. Do nothing. But I guess what they didn't realize is my feelings. I'm happy now. Compare to the past few years whr I studied at Perlis and traveling around Malaysia with my dad kaching. I'm more happier now. I'm happy being a loser that didn't do anything amazeball that worth something to post in social networking.

I'm happy. That's what I think the most important things are. I didn't have to live my live keeping up with the latest trend so people would think that I'm so up to date. I don't have to torture myself everyday studying at some fancy university so I can brag to other how smart I am. I dont have to work as someone with fancy status at some fancy workplace so people would think that I succesfull in life. I don't have to hang out at the crowded place so people would think I'm super famous. I didn't have to live up to anyone expectations. I guess I'm a loser. But a happy loser that don't give a shit anymore.

The truth of the matter is. I used to give a shit. I care what other people think of me. I want people to think highly about me. All that shit stated above. I care about every single of it. Including fashion food music status place friend. I care about all of this shit. Well used to. I've grown up and I know all that shit is not important as it used to be.

I can't argue with people who think I'm a loser now. Even if I do argue with you. I'm already to far away. When we are done arguing. You are still right here and I already gone.

I'm loser. Are you?

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